It’s your first time. You’re nervous. You don’t just have butterflies in your stomach. You’ve got the “whoa-what-have-I-gotten-myself-into” velociraptor thrashing inside your belly. You know you’ve worked really hard to get to this day. You’re pretty sure you can do it. But you’re still not 100 percent certain about what’s going to happen at the end.

You are about to run your first marathon.

Lately, several people have reached out to me to share that they are training for their first marathon and to ask for advice (way to go guys!). With many of you out there getting ready to run your first marathon this year, it occurred to me that I should write a letter to all the first timers. I’m by no means an expert. The marathon is a beast that takes years to tame, and even then it’s still surprising you and throwing you every curve ball it has in its arsenal. It can make your year or break your heart. It makes you stronger by testing all your weaknesses. And somehow, it keeps us coming back for more. After running 5 marathons, this is what I know.

Dear First Timer,

Your focus should be on finishing. While you might have a goal time you want to hit or think you can attain, you don’t know what to expect from the experience yet or how you will feel those last 5 or 6 miles. Be proud of simply making it to the finish line. Be proud of the journey you took to get there. All the months of training. All the early long runs on weekend mornings. Don’t put pressure on yourself that doesn’t matter and doesn’t really exist. Yes you should set goals for yourself, but your only real goal for your first marathon should be to finish.

You can’t control the weather. No matter how hard you try. (And trust me, I have.) Don’t waste your energy and stress on the weather the week leading up to race day. Know that you might have to adjust your goals or go slower than you were hoping to if it is hot. All you can do is the best you can do with whatever conditions you’re dealt. Remember, your focus is on finishing.

The last 6 miles are going to be hard. They might even be excruciating. Prepare yourself mentally. Know it will be hard but that you can do it. Take confidence in your training and prepare some great mantras you can tell yourself while you’re out there. (Here are some that I like: one for every mile.) You are going to be in a battle with your mind more than a battle with your body. Start talking to your brain now, and don’t let it get the better of you. You are strong. You are fierce. You will do this.

Make a solid spectator plan. The biggest mistake I made during my first marathon was not to have a very specific spectator plan. I didn’t see my family until mile 25, and it was devastating from a mental perspective when I was planning to see them sooner. Decide together where they will be on the course, which side of the road they will be on and make sure they are holding something YOU can identify. It is a lot easier for you to see them than for them to see you. Consider having them hold Mylar balloons that are a unique shape or design. Or a gigantic fluorescent sign. I’ve seen people holding alligator-shaped beach rafts, gigantic signs with their runner’s face on it, and frog-shaped umbrellas. Get creative. Looking forward to seeing the people you care about on the course will literally keep you putting one foot in front of the other when it gets tough. If possible, try to place your spectators on the course in 3 different places, and definitely around miles 16-19 when you need to dig deep.

Have fun! Make sure to look around and enjoy the mile you’re in. Read the backs of people’s shirts. Laugh at funny signs along the race course. Smile at the little kids who will be cheering you on. Notice the people who say your name if it is on your race bib or shirt. Take in the experience. There’s nothing quite like it. Don’t forget to have fun!

A few other basics to keep in mind:

• The porta potty lines are going to be long. You’re going to have to go and it is going to take a long time. Be sure to arrive at the race with plenty of time to stand in line and not be rushed or stressed to get to your corral in the starting area. And yes, it is completely fine to have a major blow out in the porta potty. You’re going to be nervous and all those nerves are going to be churning around. Everyone’s doing it. Better now than on the course.
• Write your name on your race bib or spell it in duct/athletic tape on your top. People will say your name as they cheer for you on the course and it helps give an extra pep in your step.
• Stay off your feet as much as possible the day before. Choose activities like seated tours and movies if you’re traveling to a race. Go to the race expo two days before, or first thing on the day before to avoid the crowds. Avoid sampling all the food and energy bars/drinks. You don’t need unknown things in your system the day before your race.
• Carry your fuel and hydration with you during the race if you can so you can eat and drink when you need to, not just when there is an aid station. For dinner the night before and breakfast on race day, follow the same plan you’ve been using for your long runs.
• Dress for conditions 15 degrees warmer than the current weather forecast. Once you get going, your body will heat up and it will feel about 15 degrees warmer than it actually is. Keeping your core body temperature regulated is important for a good performance, and you don’t want to overheat. If it is cold, be sure to bring some throw-away clothes that you can wear before the race starts and toss before the race or while you’re on the course. You can get an inexpensive sweat suit for about $15 at Walmart.
• If you’re traveling for your race, pack for all weather conditions. I once ran a half marathon in Florida in which I was expecting temperatures in the 60s and it was 41 degrees F. You want to be prepared for anything.

Most of all have fun and celebrate how awesome you are for doing something so amazing.

If you’ve run a marathon before, what are your tips for runners taking on their first marathon? If you’re training for your first marathon, what questions do you have? What do you most want to know about the experience?